Un-bound (Oki)

[Oki]

Oki hated to admit it, but after last night with Baoh there seemed to be some truth to what Yuki was saying. But there had to be more to it, didn't there?

"So then don't rise to it, Yuki! If you figure he's up to something, don't take the bait! That way he can't go to Tsunade or come to me if that's what he's actually after!"

Her instincts were screaming at her, everything Yuki said made sense. But she couldn't believe it, couldn't make herself see Baoh like that. Yes, he was manipulative but he wasn't malicious.

"I don't always take him at his word," she finished lamely.

[Yuki]

Yuki shook his head. She just really wasn't getting it.

"Don't take him at his word?" Yuki let it slide.

"No... I'm not going down that road... Oki... You said I have to be myself? Stop changing to keep others happy, stop showing off? That's what you wanted me to do right? Even Mine... She said We... I had a lot of growing up to do. I had to stop sitting in the dark and waiting for things to happen... That's all good advice I think... What do you think?"

[Oki]

Oki nodded hesitantly. "Yes, it is. She's pretty insightful..."

[Yuki]

"Then forget Baoh," Yuki said. "You and I don't have to work out anything. There's something there. I feel it, you feel it. No matter if you're trying to deny it or not, it's there, Oki. Just... Forget about him. You're so much better than that, and deserve so much better. Oki..." Yuki trailed off to give her a chance to put her own two cents in...

[Oki]

"Could you forget about me that easily?" Oki asked quietly. "Just walk away and never look back? It's not that simple, Yuki...." She wasn't denying anything. She just couldn't make the jump Yuki was asking her.

[Yuki]

"Quite obviously... No... I couldn't." Yuki understood what she was saying, and yes, his request was unreasonable. He tried to take Oki's hands, and hoped she'd let him.

"Then don't forget... But make things work with me instead. Baoh doesn't know what he's missing... I do..."

[Oki]

Oki didn't draw away, but she did look away. "This is my fault. He'd leave you alone if it weren't for me, and I think he's after Suoh now, too. He came into my room last night, into my bed... He sounded like you..."

[Yuki]

"I can deal with it, Oki. I don't care about Baoh, he's a four year old who's exceptionally good at manipulation and has better language... What I don't want to deal with, is watching you go back to him to be hurt again... I'm not perfect Oki... But you know I'll... ... Love you... Like you deserve," Yuki said, swallowing a lump in his throat to get past that word...

[Oki]

Oki looked up at that. Mine, as instructed, had left that particular bit out of what she had reported to Oki. "Yuki, don't..." Oki whispered, her eyes beginning to fill with tears. "Not now..."

[Yuki]

Yuki brought Oki's hands to his lips and kissed her fingers and then spoke over top of them. "This is what you wanted, Oki... You wanted me to start being myself, to let you get close, to let you see the real me. Here I am... I'm yours. I don't expect anything thing from you, except that you'll stop hiding your feelings for me. If you need space, I'll give it to you. If you need to be held, I'll never let go. If you need to cry, I'll kiss away your tears... But I have to stop running, and I have to fight for you. I can't just roll over and let Baoh walk away with you, walk all over you... and hurt you again..."

[Oki]

"Why now, Yuki? Why do you wait until I have someone else to tell me these things? Things could have been different..."

[Yuki]

"I warned you I was an idiot..." There was no humor this time. "Ok... I wanted to tell you all of it before... I tried, but you wouldn't let me close enough after we returned from our mission. Why do you think I was coming to be with you in the hospital... I know I upset you when I ran out of the room, and I'm sure Baoh put a wonderful spin on all of those events too... But you wouldn't let me talk to you again after that... How many chances have I had to actually talk to you since then? How many times have I seen you when you weren't upset with me? When I could actually talk to you, and tell you how I felt? This is the only chance I have, this is the only time when it's been just you and me, and you've let me close enough... So I'm not being an idiot this time... I'm telling you how I feel. I can't say I want you back, because I never had you... But Oki... I want you... I want you to be mine. I know you care about him, but I know you care about me too..." Yuki let got of one hand, holding both of her's in one hand, and placed the empty one on her chin to turn her face back to his... "Oki... Be mine..."

[Oki]

"God dammit it Yuki," Oki murmured, her tears falling freely. "Yes, all of that is my fault. I get it. I haven't been making the best decisions lately, and I've been hurting a lot of people. I'm sorry, Yuki. I really am. But I can't, Yuki. Not now, not like this. How well do you think it's going to work? It would only make things worse than they already are."

[Yuki]

"Then don't be mine... But don't go back to him either," Yuki said... He didn't care about fault or anything else. "He's just trying to attach puppet strings to you, Oki... You're a free spirit, not someone to be shackled..."

[Oki]

"Why would he want to, Yuki? It's not like I'm useful to him, Yuki."